As a parent, you’ve probably faced many situations that left you searching for answers. One such challenge might be figuring out what to do when your kid touches another kid. Whether it’s a friendly hug or an unwelcome poke, understanding how to handle these moments is important for teaching your child about personal boundaries and social skills, especially if they are neurodivergent or have thinking and learning differences. In this guide, we’ll share practical tips, including how Goally can help to navigate these sometimes tricky situations and teach your child the value of respecting personal space.
Table of Contents
1. Look at the Context and Intent
Before reacting, it’s important to think about the context and intent behind your child’s actions. Consider factors like their age, developmental stage, and any neurodivergent traits they may have. Remember that young children and kids with thinking and learning differences might not fully understand personal boundaries yet.
Read More: Child Development Stages
- Watch the situation and the children’s reactions
- Think about your child’s developmental stage and any unique traits
- Keep in mind that intent matters – tell the difference between curiosity, playfulness, and aggression
Understanding the context can help you respond more effectively and use tools like Goally to support your child’s development. Goally offers customizable visual schedules and social stories that can help teach kids about personal boundaries and appropriate behavior.
Read more: Understanding Unwanted Touch
2. Talk About the Situation Calmly and Firmly
Once you’ve thought about the context, it’s time to talk about the situation. Approach both children calmly and firmly, making sure not to embarrass or shame your child. Use clear language to explain what happened and why it’s important to respect personal boundaries.
- Stay calm and composed
- Use words that are easy for kids to understand
- Explain the importance of personal boundaries
When discussing the situation, remember to focus on the behavior rather than the child. This approach helps your child understand that it’s the action that needs to change, not who they are as a person. Be patient and give your child the opportunity to express their feelings and thoughts about the situation.
Read More: How to Talk So Kids Will Listen
3. Teach and Show Appropriate Behavior
Children learn best by watching and practicing. Teach your child the right ways to interact with others by showing respectful behavior and offering different ways to express themselves. For neurodivergent kids or those with thinking and learning differences, visual aids and social stories can be helpful tools in teaching these ideas.
- Show respectful behavior
- Offer different ways to express themselves
- Use visual aids and social stories for kids with unique learning needs
Goally can be a valuable resource in teaching appropriate behavior. There’s a video class (watch the preview below!) teaching kids how to understand unwanted touching. There are hundreds of other life skills classes, too, like “How To Understand Anger” and “How To Pass Gas Politely.” With customizable visual schedules and social stories, you can create personalized learning experiences for your child. By using Goally consistently, you can reinforce positive behaviors and help your child develop a better understanding of personal boundaries.
SPONSORED BY: Goally
Goally’s Kid’s Tablet has one of the largest libraries of skill-building videos (like “How to Share” and “What To Do When You’re Lost”) in the Goal Mine app.👇
4. Help Them Understand Empathy
Help your child learn empathy by encouraging them to think about how their actions might make others feel. Ask open-ended questions that make them think and understand, such as “How do you think your friend felt when you touched them?” or “How would you like it if somebody did that to you?”
- Ask open-ended questions
- Encourage thinking and understanding
- Help your child see things from others’ points of view
Developing empathy is a crucial skill for building healthy relationships. By helping your child understand the impact of their actions on others, you can guide them toward more respectful and considerate behavior. Remember to be patient and provide ongoing support as your child learns to navigate social situations.
Read more: Does My Child Have Sensory Issues?
5. Set Clear Boundaries and Expectations
Make clear boundaries and expectations for your child about personal space and physical contact. Make sure they understand that it’s important to ask for permission before touching someone and to respect others’ boundaries if they say no. Being consistent is key, so remind them of these rules often.
- Make clear rules and expectations
- Explain the importance of asking for permission
- Remind them of boundaries often
Reinforcing boundaries and expectations can be easier with tools like Goally. By using visual schedules and social stories, you can provide a consistent framework for your child to follow. This consistency helps your child internalize the importance of respecting personal boundaries and fosters a greater understanding of appropriate behavior.
6. Get Professional Help if Needed
If your child keeps having trouble understanding and respecting personal boundaries, think about getting professional help. A therapist or counselor who specializes in working with neurodivergent kids or those with thinking and learning differences can offer valuable advice and strategies made just for your child’s needs.
- Ask a therapist or counselor if needed
- Find specialized help for neurodivergent kids
- Use personalized strategies to help your child’s needs
Remember that every child is unique, and it’s essential to find the right support for their individual needs. By seeking professional help when needed, you can ensure your child receives the guidance and tools necessary to develop healthy social skills and personal boundaries.
Goally | 100+ Life Skill Video Classes
Does your child need some extra guidance on building essential life skills? Goally’s skill building tablet for kids includes a TV app that has the most robust video library of skills training videos for kids. Ranging from content like “How to Brush Your Teeth” to “How to Make Friends at School,” we have dozens of interactive video lessons for kids with thinking and learning differences.
Flashback Zack leads your child through video classes that teach life skills. They’ll learn social, hygiene, and living skills that are key to their independence.
Get Goally’s Tablet for $149 (and unlock all 100+ video classes for $9/mo!).
Final Thoughts: Building a Strong Foundation for Healthy Relationships
Knowing what to do when your kid touches another kid is an important part of parenting. By talking about these situations calmly and proactively, you can help your child learn the social skills and empathy they need to have healthy relationships throughout their lives. Remember, it’s still early enough to start teaching your child about personal boundaries and the importance of respecting others’ space. With patience, understanding, and the support of tools like Goally, you can guide your child toward a future filled with positive and meaningful connections.
FAQs About What To Do When Your Kid Touches Another Kid
Why is it important to address when your kid touches another kid? It's essential to address this behavior to teach your child about personal boundaries, respect for others, and consent.
What should you do immediately when your child touches another child? Calmly intervene, separate the children, and explain why touching others without their permission is inappropriate.
How can visual schedules help my child understand appropriate touch? Visual schedules can provide a clear sequence of actions that promote appropriate social interactions, including respecting personal boundaries.
Are there specific apps that can help my child regulate their emotions and prevent inappropriate touching? Emotional regulation apps like 'Breath, Think, Do with Sesame,' 'Smiling Mind' or Goally's 'Mood Tuner' can help children understand their feelings and react appropriately.
How can rewards reinforce appropriate behavior in children? Rewards, when used correctly, can positively reinforce good behavior, such as respecting personal space, thereby discouraging inappropriate touching.
This post was originally published on 05/01/2023. It was updated on 11/22/2023.
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